That Was the Year That Wasn’t
What if they gave a year and nobody noticed?
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times
— Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities
A s I mentioned in another article, I recently rediscovered a trove of old letters-to-the-editor that I had sent to the San Francisco Chronicle over the years when I was still a denizen of the Bay Area. You can find that first letter here:
Here’s another that I wrote in January 1999, as anticipation was building toward the millennium celebrations then less than a year away. The paper had run the following item on January 5:
Scientist and best-selling author Steven Gould writes, “If we insist that all decades must have ten years, and centuries one hundred years, then year 10 belongs to the first decade — and sad to say, year 100 must remain in the first century. Thenceforward the issue never goes away. Every year with a 00 must count as the hundredth and final year of its century — no matter what common sensibility might prefer . . .” The last time around, “virtually every important public celebration for the new century . . . occurred from Dec. 31, 1900, into Jan. 1, 1901. Moreover, essentially every major newspaper and magazine officially welcomed the new century with their first issue of January 1901 . . .” Gould goes on to explain that the seemingly universal decision to ignore the distinction that still mattered in 1900 means that the 20th century will be the first in history to be made up of only 99 years.
This was my reply, which appeared in the Chronicle of January 11:
Editor:
Here we are, early in January, and already the debate is starting over whether the end of 1999 really marks the turn of the millennium. For most of us, the landmark transition will occur when we see the numbers on the odometer kick over from 999 to 000. Sticklers and purists insist that the new millennium doesn’t really begin until a year later on 1/1/01. All such controversy should be laid to rest, however, by the recent discovery of a hitherto-unknown year, long lost in the mists of antiquity.
For twenty centuries, the Year Zero had been completely forgotten by historians, owing to the fact that absolutely nothing of consequence happened during its entire twelve months. The Huns didn’t invade, Mount Vesuvius didn’t erupt, no comets were sighted, no emperors assassinated. The Lions devoured the Gladiators, as usual, in the Colosseum in Super Bowl DCCLIII. (A new franchise, the Christians, was founded on December 25 of that year and went on to become perhaps the most successful expansion team the world has ever known.)
History does record, however, that massive New Year’s festivities took place on the calends of January, marking the long-awaited end of the B.C.’s. Throngs of revelers jammed the Roman Forum to celebrate the first year in human history without a minus sign, after endless eons of counting backward instead of forward for no reason anyone understood. Predictably, a few die-hards rose to harangue the crowd, claiming that the new era would not officially begin until the Year One, but couldn’t make themselves heard above the general din.
Since the first decade began in the Year Zero, it follows that the Teens began in the year 10, the Twenties in the year 20, and so on. The 1900s thus began in 1900 and the 2000s will begin in 2000, as any child can plainly see. I trust this settles the matter once and for all, and that we will be hearing no more about it for at least another millennium.
V. O. Reason
Berkeley
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“That Was the Year That Wasn’t” by Stephen Chernicoff is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.
